Good friends, music, one day at a time

The next few months my life will not be my own, there has been so much going on. I'm writing and journaling and recording, and I sit here at 5AM not able to turn my mind off. Life just isn't fair sometimes, and it piles up with things out of our control. You try desperately to grab onto something you have some sort of control over, and still end up hurting in the end. I know there will be a light at the end of the tunnel, there has to be, but right now, it is hard to take the first step. Grief is so hard. Knowing how to cope in the right way is so hard. Not knowing what comes next, if you will make it through that tunnel, is even harder. A good friend of mine told me to escape to the world of music. It allows you to express yourself and relate to something universal. And so I will try to put myself in a less destructive place, try to to put my head in a different place. That is what I am trying to hold onto: good friends, music, a day at a time. I will get through this. And while I try to hide and avoid it all, I have been blessed with this incredible support system that has held me up, and continues to hold me up, every time I feel defeated.




And there's holes in the floor of heaven, and her tears are falling down
That's how you know shes watching
Wish she could be here now
Sometimes when Im lonely
I remember she can see
Yes there's holes in the floor of heaven
And shes watching over you and me
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Although the sun will never shine the same,
I'll always look to a brighter day
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And I know your shining down on me from heaven,
And I know we'll be together one sweet day

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I'm sorry, I never told you, all I wanted to say...

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You find your faith has been lost and shaken
You take back what's been taken
Get on your knees and dig down deep
You can do what you think is impossible
Keep on believing, don't give in
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Sometimes I take on this world by myself,
Thinking I got all the answers, don't need anybodys help

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Oh why, thats what I asking
Was there anything i could have said or done
Oh I had no clue you were masking a troubled soul
God only knows what went wrong and why you'd leave the stage in the middle of a song
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I miss you so much
your light, your smile, your way
though you're gone, you still here
in my heart, in my tears
yeah, you sure left your mark
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And maybe someday, we'll figure all this out, try to put an end to all this doubt try to find a way to just feel better now and maybe someday we'll live our lives out loud we'll be better off somehow, someday.
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I've been high, I've been low
I've been yes, and I've been oh hell no
I've been rock and roll and disco
wont you save me San Fransicisco