Get me Bodied, I survived!

I am currently in bed at 8:00 am on my first Tuesday of summer vacation, listening to Get Me Bodied by Beyonce...a nice morning wake-up song to get you going. I decided that a post was necessary as I finished my first year of teaching last Friday, and well, it deserves reflection.

I had a very, very successful first year of teaching. On most days it felt like I had been teaching forever. Coming off of my student teaching experience, I felt extremely prepared. I fell into a very different environment for my first year, compared to that of student teaching, but it is exactly where I wanted to end up. Spanish, middle school, it is always what I have wanted to do. I questioned millions of times whether or not teaching was right for me in college, and working this year showed me that this is exactly where I am supposed to be right now. It comes naturally to me, and while yes there are good days and bad days and teaching is some of the most exhausting work I have ever done, I enjoyed my job on most days.

You work so hard for so long to get to your chosen profession. When I think back to college and remember all the all-nighters, getting into the college of ed, student teaching and grad school, taking horrible classes just to get my degree, studying abroad, throw in life---with boyfriends, ex-boyfriends, friendships, ex-friendships, birthdays, parties,learning about trust and commitment and procrastination and how far emotionally you can be stretched until you break, all to ultimately get to be a teacher. Is it worth it? Well...let's look at what I learned this year.

So, what did I learn this year:

1. Be flexible. Things often don't go as planned, and there is no reason to beat yourself up over it.

2. Middle schoolers are hormonal, more so than I ever was. There will be inappropriate touching, and you may just find a girl in the boys bathroom doing, well, inappropriate touching.

3. Notes are still very popular in middle school...read them when you catch the kids writing them. It can provide hours of entertainment. Then threaten if you ever catch them with a note again you will read it over morning announcements, that usually stops the note writing;)

4. Middle schoolers don't understand sarcasm very much, use it anyways. The kids really do appreciate a great sense of humor.

5. Tell the kids about yourself. I explained on the first day of school that I am an organizational freak, that our classes will be color coded, and even if the student is not organized he or she will be organized in my class or I will have a nervous breakdown...it worked.

6. Tell the kids more about yourself....I explained very early on my love for Carrie Underwood and my hate towards Taylor Swift....the whole school ended up knowing about it. Questions would pop up on tests about them, there would be extra credit offered about them, kids would come in with Taylor Swift shirts and I wouldn't let them in my room...the kids loved it, loved that I could play around and not be 100% academic all the time, you have to let loose a little bit, well a lot a bit or you will lose your mind.

7. Never tell the kids how old you are...my kids till don't know. It's a fun game all year having them guess that you are 18, 16, and even 35!

8. Ask about their weekends, and ask about their issues. Maybe its the counselor in me but while I want my kids to do well in my class, I also want my kids to do well in life...I always make it a priority to keep my door open to talk...and boy did I hear stories this year when I did. It felt good to make a difference.

9. Kids can be assholes. I had some real yahoos in my class. They can make or break your day if you let them. Make fun of them, tease them if you must, then just write them up, they are not worth your time. Some kids no matter how much you try, are too busy in their own world to care. They want too much attention. Try everything you can to get through to them, but sometimes they just need to grow up a little bit.

10. Have patience, lots and lots of patience.

11. Try to be a week ahead of yourself planning, it makes life a lot easier.

12. Make mistakes in front of the kids.

13. Make your classroom colorful! The kids loved my classroom and its chili pepper theme. So did I. A bright, interactive, classroom makes are the difference in the world.

14. Make the children move, they do NOT do well just sitting.

15. Give projects, lots of them. It gives you a break from active teaching, and it allows them to be creative.

16. Use rubrics, it makes grading a lot easier.

17. You get paid from 7:30-3:30 do not take work home to grade after those hours unless someone pays you for it. I got that advice about two months into the school year. And I haven't looked back. (most of the time)

18. Be nice to the secretaries and the custodians.

19. It's ok to show movies.

20. You feel really really good when other teachers come to you and tell you your kids are using Spanish in their classrooms.

21. Connect with other teachers at the school. Having friends at work, adult friends, is a life saver. It kept me sane this year without a doubt. Who else understands? And when things came up this year personally, that were completely unexpected, these friends were the first ones to step up and be 100% supportive.

22. Being a young teacher, it is important to keep the line between teacher and friend very clear. Kids want my cell phone number, facebook, etc. A complement in the sense they related to me, but also I am their teacher, and so it is important to make it understood from the start. We can be friends after you graduate high school is always my rule of thumb.

23. The kids have a fascination with my first name. I tell them. I know a lot of teacher's don't. I don't care, tell them and be done. They get over it.

24. Every day is a new day, don't hold grudges with the kids.

25. BE CONSISTENT. Kids crave routine.

26. Tell the kids when you are having a bad day, everyone has them, why shouldn't you, they respect that.

27. Teach what you are passionate about, go out of the book, teach what will interest the kids.

28. Work was an escape, on many levels, and I will miss it this summer on a certain level.

29. I appreciated how well I was brought up and the "normal" family I was raised in, some of my students had such horrible home lives, I could not even imagine

30. When May 1st hits, kids shut down, you will shut down. Last minute things happen at the end of the year. Unexpected things happen at the end of the year that can completely throw you. It did for me. As hard as it may be try to Vent. Talk. Take Deep Breaths. The end of the school year takes strength and lots of coffee to get through.

31. Having the kids use shaving cream to clean off the their desks at the end of the year does wonders.

And in the end...you will see that all of this pays off. I came to the last day of school with tears in my eyes as I was greeted with a group of my favorite students. A big boquet of my favorite flowers; gerber daisys. Starbucks cards, Beaners Cards, bath and body works things...and the kids were just balling crying so hard they didn't want to leave my class. But more than the presents and the tears were the letters I got from my kids. Kids, who cannot write one paragraph in English wrote me three and four page letters detailing everything we did in class, all the memories, every funny thing I said. The letters were so sweet a wonderful mix of maturity and typical middle school lingo and said things such as " I learned more in your class than any other class and if I had to go and live in Spain right now I could. OR There are very few people that I genuinely respect and you are one of them because you actually treated me like a human being and not some little kid you had the displeasure of teaching OR You taught us amazing words like tenedor and sacapuntas lol OR I will never forget your love of Carrie Underwood and your hatred towards Taylor Swift OR I could come to talk to you about anything and I am not sure who I will go to next year in high school OR You made Spanish so fun with all the songs and games you taught us you really cared about how successful we were OR You always believed in me, even when I ceased to believe in myself, and when I go to California and win my Academy Award I am going to thank you in my speech OR I have one piece of advice for you, don't change because you are perfect just the way you are." I mean these are 12 and 13 year olds.

I have always said if I can just make a difference in one students life the way that my favorite teachers made a difference in mine, and I can honestly say I feel I made a difference and it is a WONDERFUL feeling. The future is unknown, and grad school starts in two weeks, I am unsure of my schedule for this summer, and my heart still races with stress but for the first time in a long time I feel proud of myself. I feel like I am making a difference. I feel like I have surrounded myself with people, new friends and old that have made me feel really good about myself and where I am headed. It's a process, like I said, there is still so much uknown and still so much I question...but for now, for right now, I am going to enjoy the fact that I more than just survived my first year, rather I am gong to enjoy the sense of accomplishment and pride that my first year of teaching brought.

Some Thoughts

As my heart races to 150 beats per minute, strangely I feel (or I know I should feel) incredibly blessed, yet it is hard for me to catch my breath. I think about how I have felt in the past, how is this the same, how is this different? I try to talk about it, but not sure the words come out right. I wonder what I have done to get myself to this point. I am ridden with guilt, as I try to decide what is best for me. I wonder if I worry too much about what others will think, I wonder if I will be any less of a person. I am struggling with feeling a lack of control. I am wondering if my worrying is making me worry too much. While my personality has driven me to keep a good sense of humor, a listening ear, a good reputation, treat others well, try to always find a middle ground, think about how I treat the people closest to me, has lead me to great success and has pushed me to see how much I can accomplish; I find myself wondering how much of who I am, has also held me back. I want to be better at standing up for myself, and not feel guilty. I think a very big part of me just wants to make sure I am on the right path and that I matter in some way, to somebody. I want to feel good about who I am, and where I am, and where I am going. I want to be ok with it all. And as I start to think about how far I have come, and how far I have left to go...I can feel my heart begin to race all over again....



I have lost 10lbs through my running training, and since this is always a constant battle for me, I do feel good for that accomplishment. Although, at least with weight, and exercise, I have some control of the results....

As thankful as I am for summer vacation and not having to work in the summer, I think almost a bigger part of me is nervous for what this summer will bring. I do much better on a routine, with a schedule, and I suppose I would feel better if I knew what was going on in the fall. But there is going to be a lot me that misses the distraction that work provides, the students..the good and the bad, my friends here, lesson planning, it all, for the most part takes so much focus off of myself and worrying about me. I will miss that. I am happy for the break though, because as much of a distraction that work provides, it also is making me insanely stressed out.

Quotes of the Day:

¨It takes more courage to reveal insecurities than to hide them.¨

"Señorita, I would throw him out the window if that would make you happy.¨

¨Anyone can give up, its the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that´s true strength.¨